“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.” – Thornton Wilder
For those of us in the U.S., being grateful around Thanksgiving is a national pastime.
So much so that it sometimes feels a little cliché.
But what if the simple practice of expressing gratitude was, in fact, one of the keys to being healthy and happy…and to successfully reaching your health goals?
The science of gratitude and positive thinking is kind of fascinating (and surprisingly un-Pollyanna-ish ;). Since I’m a psychology geek, I LOVE digging around in the research to find little nuggets I can use to make my life – and your life – just a little healthier.
Here’s what I’ve found, plus some practical ways to build more gratitude and positive thinking into your life.
Practicing gratitude and positive thinking changes us both mentally and physically.
It seems pretty obvious that, if we can find the upsides in our lives, we feel better mentally. It turns out that positive thinking also has a ton of physical health benefits. From increased life span to greater resistance to the common cold to reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease, focusing on the positive makes our minds as well as our bodies healthier.
And the truth is that, to reach our health goals (any goals, really), we MUST focus on what’s going well.
I see it every day with clients…there’s just no other way, because obstacles are inevitable. Cultivating positivity, resilience, and “grit” is key to success.
In fact, psychologist Angela Lee Duckworth found that “grit” is a better predictor of success than even IQ. (You can see her talk more about it here.) Dr. Duckworth defines grit as “passion and perseverance for very long-term goals. Having stamina. Sticking with your future, day in and day out and working really hard to make that future a reality. Grit is living life like it’s a marathon, not a sprint.”
One way to build grit, Dr. Duckworth believes, is having a “belief mindset.” A term coined at Stanford University, a belief mindset is the belief that “the ability to learn is not fixed; that it can change with effort.”
It seems to me that focusing on what’s going well – being grateful for the results of your effort so far – is a good way to start believing that you can do even more.
Before you tell me I’m being too “Pollyanna,” understand that positive thinking doesn’t mean being unrealistic about challenges.
In his influential book Learned Optimism, psychologist and founder of positive psychology Martin Seligman explains that pessimists “believe that bad events will last a long time, will undermine everything they do, and are their own fault” while optimists “believe that defeat is just a temporary setback or a challenge, that its causes are just confined to this one case.”
Positive thinking, it seems, is less about being unrealistically upbeat and more about approaching challenges with a positive outlook…and with “grit.”
Now for the practical stuff. Staying positive takes practice, but it CAN be learned, even if you tend to be pessimistic.
When I slip into negative thinking – soooo easy to do and makes me sooooo unproductive! – one of these “tricks” usually gets me back on track. And there’s even research to back them up.
- Think of three things I’m grateful for. Simple as that. Make a list, mentally or on paper. It works wonders.
- Do what ought to be done. This is one of Gretchen Rubin’s “Twelve Commandments” from her NY Times bestselling book The Happiness Project. Nothing makes me grumpier than leaving necessary tasks undone. So just do it. Check it off the list…and feel 100 times happier.
- Be mindful of negative thoughts (without getting sucked into them). Sometimes just noticing your negative thoughts – and letting them float on by without getting sucked into the unhappiness, my life sucks vortex – is enough to diffuse them. Having a mindfulness meditation practice is a great place to start cultivating this habit of noticing without attaching.
- Replace “I have to” with “I get to.” If you’re like me, you often find yourself saying “I HAVE to go to the grocery store. I HAVE to go workout. I HAVE to do laundry.” As odd as it sounds, just replacing “have to” with “get to” flips things to positive in 10 seconds. I even wrote a whole blog post about it once. Try it and let me know how you feel.
Now it’s your turn. Tell me in the comments:
- What do you do to cultivate gratitude and positive thinking in your life?
- How has staying positive helped you stay happier (and healthier)?
Happy Thanksgiving and Happy Hanukkah to you if you’re celebrating either…or both!
xo,
